Hello, Gut, my old…

Not exactly “friend”, but if you’ve read any of my past blog posts, you wouldn’t be surprised that it exists.

I can’t seem to help myself. I eat portions that are more than I am actually hungry for, I eat dessert and sweet things often and I don’t exercise. And, I also seem to have trouble with…errr…expelling (I am often constipated). It’s no surprise that my gut is majorly bloated quite often.

I remember a time in high school…I was in Grade 10 and there was this girl in Grade 11…super popular, short, blond girl. I remember hearing her say that when she gains weight, it goes straight to her boobs. In my mind, I was like, “Fuck that girl!!”, not just because that didn’t seem fair that when she gains fat, it goes to an area most people would want their fat to go to, but also because I have been almost flat as a board my whole life. In the fruit comparisons, I’d say that likening to cherries would be quite generous.

Our bodies are so interesting…how people are tall and short, big boobs, small boobs, big eyes, small eyes…there are so, sooo many variations and combinations!!! I’m pretty tall for a woman, and have been pretty skinny most of my life. I do have the unfortunate genes that when I gain weight, it’s mostly in my gut (thanks Mamma! 😉 Not in my butt or my boobs (some people are lucky!! Jerks.) Hahah. They say that weight gain in the gut is the worst area to gain weight. <sigh>

Now, in my ideal mind/world, if I had things like self-discipline and motivation, then I wouldn’t be choosing to eat Krispy Kreme donuts, or having Ben & Jerry’s chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream with Bailey’s drizzled on top, with a bit (well, a BIG bit) of cinnamon on top (just had that…it was delicious. And I’m also glad that I’m wearing stretch pants right now). I’d be exercising…doing crunches…working on my core. My core use to be pretty strong too, but now…I’ve “let it go”, as it were.

I often wonder what it would be like to be that person…there’s YouTube person that has a channel called “Boho Beautiful” and she is gorgeous, and basically travels for a living, as well as doing yoga (or something like that). I looked at her page and wondered what it must be like to be her…I imagine it’s pretty awesome. To be beautiful, have a passion in life that you’re following, traveling and getting paid to do that, as well as being tan, very in-shape and vegan. I know that every human on this planet has challenges of some sort, but I feel like these kinds of people are ahead of the game in a way.

There’s also another woman from Australia that travels the world with her boyfriend and is paid for it. She is also blond, tan, beautiful and very fit.

I understand that happiness starts from the inside and that even people like that, who from the outside seem like they’re very happy and “have it all”, may still have “inner demons” and, of course, challenges.

If I were to work on my own “inner demons”, I’d be less likely to go toward these outer things to make me happy.

What’s it going to take to make a change? xo

*M

P.S. I found that picture on the internet…I *wish* my gut looked like the far left! But, it illustrates how I also get so bloated, like this woman.

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