Debt, that is.
Oh man. Debt is like the stressor that we may not even be aware of, but that lurks over us. My dad told me that once I’m out of debt, I’ll see how much lighter I feel.
My dad use to be challenged with spending money that he didn’t have and ended up claiming bankruptcy because of it. My mom also has had moments where she spent money that she didn’t have, but lucky (or not?) for her and I, we have my grandparents (her parents) that bail us out.
But, that’s not how I want to be. I want to be the kind of person that is able to save money. The type of person that earns what I earn, and spends within my means. That doesn’t rely on my grandparents, who busted their BUTTS to earn what they have. I feel…bad that I’ve relied on them so much over the years.
In my current position, so many people have said to me, “Are you saving a lot?” My reply, “Not at all”. Because, not only would any money I have go toward my debt, but on top of that, I’ve been taking more courses (in the program that I’m in, there are many offshoots of very cool things to take). BAH. I was thinking about how if I’d put that money I spent toward my debt…I wouldn’t have that much debt at all. Not to mention the thousands of dollars in INTEREST that I’d save per year.
FML, right? Or FM (eff me…haha, because it’s me that’s doing it).
So, from here on forward, my focus is to live within my means and if I’m feeling shitty, then no going to the mall. If I’m able to catch myself in those moments is the key. Right now I feel quite focused and set, but when I feel down and whatever in those moments, it’s harder.
Like Alcoholics Anonymous, there is a group called Debtors Anonymous. I think that when I go back to my regular life, I’ll join a group and get myself together.
I have a friend that became a financial advisor and she told me she made $250,000 last year. To me, that’s like WOW WOW WOW. Amazing!!!! I can’t even imagine making that much!
The freedom it must feel to have so much money and be able to do what you want, when you want to and never stress about it.
But, right now, I’m going to eat my dinner (it’s already 9:35pm and it’s not ready yet), then I’m going to eat a donut, get ready for bed, journal, watch “Grace and Frankie” and go to sleep. xo