I don’t like lying. Of course, I have lied before in my life, but generally, I don’t like it. It feels really bad. I don’t want to be the kind of person that lies.
I had a moment tonight with someone where they were talking about their children and they said that they sleep 11 hours a night. Which is completely not true. It was in front of their friend and before thinking about it, I said, Welllll…and then followed up with some comment about how one of the kids wakes up because their soother falls out.
The truth is though…they don’t. One of them sleeps about 8.5ish hours (average 7:30pm-4am), but the other one wakes up at least 3 times a night, which includes eating at about 1-2am, and then again at 5am. So, neither of them has ever slept 11 hours straight.
Part of me wonders if they just aren’t aware that it’s not true? Or if they don’t count the many times in the night that the kids wake up for like 10-20 mins. Or maybe they want to have the image that their children sleep for such a long time. I don’t know. I think I will ask, because I’m curious about the reasoning behind it. Bottom line: the parent isn’t the one that gets up with the kids in the night.
I did notice that I reacted in the moment though. I don’t like lying and I don’t like supporting lying. Regardless of if it’s intentional, or not.
I know that when I’ve lied in the past, it feels so shitty. I don’t want to be the type of person who lies. Who deceives myself and other people…for what? To not experience the consequences of the situation? Perhaps.
I feel a bit scared to ask about their motivation. I think it’ll be about how I ask.
I remember I had an ex-boyfriend who would embellish (aka lie) when he was telling stories because “it made the story better”. The thing is, people BELIEVE it! They think that what you’re saying is true. So, why put out these false reality?
What is so wrong with living in the “real” reality? To the best of our abilities, anyway. I think it would be good for me to look at and work through my reaction before asking him. I think a part of me wishes that they slept more and that there’s something wrong that they wake up so much, so I think that shades my feeling about it. Then to have the parent be either lying or so unaware…I think there’s a judgment in there too. Something to look at!
Within each reaction, there’s some kind of personal growth work to be done! xo